Sunday, July 19, 2015

Update

Hello dear friends,
I try to keep this blog clear of problems, and art focused, but my life dictates differently lately, so I thought I would try and answer all the questions I have been getting recently regarding family life. I saw my friend Paula Journal Artista put it all out there recently, so I thought a little honesty might help.

As many of you know, my Dad took very ill in April. He has congestive heart failure, needs a valve replacement, and has been deemed too high risk to undergo a surgery. He also was told he does not have long to live. As he is always the underdog who beats the odds when it comes to health care, we have been providing him support care, with daily visits, chores, medication monitoring etc. He has good days and bad days. Days where he remembers everything, and days where he does not know what day it is. It is a difficult struggle, and I have become his parent which is even more difficult to bear. My Mom is still fighting her diabetes, and remains in a wheelchair. This limits her ability to help out with Dad. Add to that the fact that they no longer drive, and have been married 51 years, and you get the picture. They get no break from each other, as Dad needs monitoring all the time.
My job is as stressful as ever. Summer at the shore is a time where millions of dollar are at stake, literally, so I am a working fiend May-Sept.  A typical day is 12 hours, and most of it on my feet, which hurt a lot most of the time.


My darling Keith, still struggles to find work, as in our area with casinos closing, and foreclosure rates skyrocketing, there is no work. I am grateful he helps out with my parents.
We have a friend, who recently lost his mother,  as well as her home where he lived , who has moved in with us. He also was let go from his job not long after he buried his mother, and work is not available.
Depression is always knocking at my door, but I just don't have time to entertain it. I am the only source of income for  for my family aside from. my parents retirement income which does not go far enough.
I have long felt the solution would be to buy a bigger home, move my parents into it with all of us. I even found the perfect place. Then I started down the road to finance. So very difficult, as when you have been carrying others, for literal years, you tend to amass some debt.
Selling our current house is not an option, as we are in foreclosure. Not in my name, but in Keith's.
I have called in every avenue I can to be able to pay off my debt, and then I am told I can become financed.It just is not enough money. I am selling off my art supplies, (see former post) at a deep discount, and I managed to raise $50.
It is a daunting, depressing task.
I feel as though , I am playing beat the clock with my father's health, and the answer is to buy a home where we can all be together, and he can be comfortable.
I just want to do this one thing for them, and there are road blocks at every turn.
I have spoken to many professionals, in finance, and there just are no easy answers. So this is my truth, and what I contend with on a daily basis. This is why I have vanished from all of my art work, and online friends.

If you would like to help I set up a Go Fund Me campaign:gofundme.com/zqayt7y



I cannot thank you all enough.

2 comments:

  1. Oh honey I'm so sorry you're going through this...it's never easy is it? I can't imagine the responsibility you have on your shoulders. I send you my love & support from afar <3 hugs

    ReplyDelete
  2. Just when you think that your life is tough, you read about someone else's and everything is not so bad. I can't imagine losing my home, mine is just a double wide mobile that needs a lot of work, cosmetic mostly but all of it is just too expensive. I am in Victoria, BC Canada and retired on a medical disability pension, so funds are just not there. I lost my Dad 30 years ago today, it feels like yesterday. I lost my Mum 11 years ago, and boy I tell ya, there are times when I sure could use a hug from my Mum. Its hard to be cheery when your life seems to be falling apart. I can only wish you well and send healing prayers from here. Times like this I wish I could win that lottery and help people like yourself with a dream that needs filling. Stay strong and fight for what you believe in, try and stay positive. Try and find the good that is there, you will see, something will happen.
    hugz and well wishes for you and your family.

    ReplyDelete